Feather Pen

Snow Snakes

2009-02-18T11:34:00.000-08:00

I'm supposed to be updating. So here's an update! I went to see the Cho and am back now. >.>; Clearly. No Internet for my laptop at her place! It didn't like me.

I need....Free Time and Open for Business for my Sims. And Apartment Life, which I see at Wal-Mart all the time but never think to get. Smart, huh?

The snow has gone away for now...which is nice. My chickens are now free to roam the yard! But before that, we had a case of snow snakes in front of our porch. That's right...snow snakes. Snow loving snakes that burrow tunnels in the snow all over the place and hibernate all the rest of the year. Of course, these are really mice digging around in snow in search of food...but shhhhh.

Recent occurences for me are...I got my head shaved. And a raise at work. Why, I have no clue. I've really been slacking a lot lately...but that place just bores me to death. So I work while reading Shrink Talk and the Bunny Blog. Yep...boring days.

In answer to Cho's blog...my spirit animal would probably be...a snake. Because I've always liked snakes...always felt close to them, though I'd never own one. I would never be able to handle feeding it a mouse or rat or anything like that...seeing as I love the little rodents.

Jade Rain

2008-11-16T13:03:00.000-08:00

Levy just has a close call with a hawk. Close call meaning she's still alive and well. And completely unharmed. She was scared, though. Scared to the point that she actually hopped up into the house when I opened the door. None of my chickens do that. Well...Gene does now and then if I open the door, but that's only on rare occasion, so it doesn't count.

I woke up feeling good today. And then I went back to sleep because Smudge woke me up to let her back under the blanket. But then I woke up again and I was still feeling good! Amazing, I know. And I guess I'm still feeling good...and it's probably why I actually answered Cho when she asked what I was doing. With something other than "nothing" anyway. That's how I usually answer, which is usually a lie...because I'm always doing something. But what I'm doing is usually boring so it's not worth saying.

And now I think my day is going to turn bad because I just told Choness one of the reasons my sex drive plummeted to near zero. I've heard that low self-esteem is a turn off for guys...so I guess it's not that strange that it is for me too. I really don't like it...even though I have it. -Points to crappy stories.-

I'm back to being rich in Harvest Moon! And I'm only in my second summer on the game, too. Almost about to finally be able to get a sheep. Stupid two boy farmer requirement. I love sheep. And on this game they're actually more profitable than the cows. I don't think they've ever been in any of the other games. Which is why Loser usually sticks to mostly cows. Or so she claims. I know it's just because she loves cows.

Yep. No getting that one by me.

Cho needs more for her Christmas present. She's already got three things, one of which she knows, but she needs more! Yes she does. But I dunno what else to get her. I haven't gone to the mall recently, so that's probably why. I normally just walk around until I find something that says -insert name here- to me.

I bought mum some dark chocolate cordial cherries today. She loves those for some reason. I don't really. When I get them, I usually break open the chocolate covering and suck out the juice inside, then eat the chocolate. Then the cherry. They're not something I love...but they do taste good. And you can only get them around this time, so it's a nice treat.

Oh! Mum came upon a fern recently. A big fern. So now instead of a Christmas tree, we're having a Christmas fern. I think that's amusing. We can't put any heavy ornaments on it, though. But that's fine..we have some light ones.

My brother needs to get a job soon. He's got a whole bunch of bills to pay that mum's going to have to pay if he doesn't get his ass in gear. And he's eating all of my stuff! Around here when there's only a little bit left of something, you leave it until we can get more. Little bit of cheese left means you wait for more. Just enough milk left for three bowls of cereal in the morning doesn't mean you drink the milk. It means you leave it and get something else to drink. Or don't drink anything at all, like me.

Now, I understand that being a felon and pretty much uneducated means you aren't likely to find a good job, but even with the economy dying someone has got to be hiring. It's the holiday season. Shipping companies need extra help shipping things. He should try for one of those. UPS would probably hire him for the season.

I can't really think of anything else here. Though I did come up with a plan to make room for Jade. I have two deskish things in my room right now, one of which is holding the empty 40 gallon tank. I can just move that and the other empty tank out of my room and put Mickey's cage on where the 40 gallon was..and there should be enough room for a good ferret cage to take up the other side. And there! Room for Jade. ^-^

I also need to get another frame for this Wolf's Rain poster Loser gave me. She likes it..and she knows I take good care of my posters. Otherwise she wouldn't have given it to me. I like Wolf's Rain too. I'm not as in to it as she is, but I definitely like that series. And I like that it actually comes to an end! That's right. It comes to an end. Unlike Naruto and Inu Yasha that go on for 40+ seasons. (That was a clear exaggeration..but you get the point.)

Things

2008-10-13T19:06:00.000-07:00

Nothing really to say, but I'm pretty sure Cho's last post had a subtle nudge for me to post in it, so here we go!

They're trying to rope me into showing up on Wednesday. Work, that is. It's not happening. I like my Wednesdays off. I'm not going to stay just because they want me to do a job someone else could do. Screw them.

Dad's voting for McCain apparently. Stupid move, if you ask me. At least Obama has a brain. And his vice president appears to have a brain as well. Points to them.

I may be getting a ferret soon. Her name's Jade...and Amanda doesn't want her anymore. Why? Because she bites a little too hard when playing. -.- It don't see what the big deal is with that...it's not like she draws blood or anything. But oh well...ferret for me!

I started my LeafGreen over again. I'm doing a pure bug team. So far I've got Beedrill, Butterfree, and Parasect. I'm getting a Venonat soon..then Pinsir. Then I'm thinking I should get a Shuckle. I've never really raised one of those before.

I went to a bookstore last weekend and got myself some new psychology books to read. One on DID..one called Prozac Nation and another called Sickened. I haven't started reading any of them yet..but I will.

Another

2008-09-10T15:06:00.000-07:00

Look at this! Another post. Aren't we lucky?

I went to Wal-Mart earlier. That's right...Wal-Mart. Where I got some Pocky. Strawberry Pocky.

I also realized that I haven't had a single grapefruit this year while I was there. And then I realized why I haven't had a single one. Over a dollar for one is way too much. Oranges are ove 50 cents per, too. -.- I bought two of those, though...just because I haven't had any but canned ones in a while. Canned just isn't the same.

I bought some Yuugiou cards, too! ^-^ They had a nice combo set up in them...so I think I'll have to build a deck around that.

In HM, I finally won a crop festival. Finally. An S rank corn did it for me. I was all proud of my corn...and then they shipped it for me and gave me a blue wonderful, which I didn't really want.I was hoping for a yellow, orange, or green one...but oh well. At least I finally won.

And..that's it.

River Rat

2008-09-06T13:30:00.000-07:00

Kouryuu died last night. I buried him when I got up this morning. I can still smell the decay.

Other than that, there's really nothing much else to write about.

I've been playing Harvest Moon: Island of Happiness a lot. I don't really like the new crop system, since I always get screwed over in spring...but all in all, I like it. No complaints. Other than the new crop system, of course.

Mabinogi is having this "be a nine year old" event this weekend. I thought it was sort of cool...at first. Now I hate it. It's completely wiped out Pyra's intelligence, which makes it difficult to make any potions. And for Amadeo, out of 34 iron ores he managed to make three iron ingots. And get only 43% of a dagger done with those three iron ingots.

It sucks.

Afro

2008-08-29T17:38:00.000-07:00

It was said that I needed a new post yesterday, so here one is.

Chain died today.

I also got my anniversary present from Cho...A pretty bowl and cup with my name...and an eternity butterfly on each. And new chopsticks, too.

I also got Harvest Moon: Island of Happiness today. So, I'm playing that now.

MMORPG

2008-07-23T18:24:00.000-07:00

So...I found this fun little Pokemon MMORPG. It's all laggy currently and there are a few glitches here and there...but I don't think it's bad for beta. I think it's fun. I've always wanted to play the pokemon games with other people. Plus, it's eventually going to have all of the different regions, I believe...which I've also always wanted in one of these games.

The only thing bad about it (other than the glitches, lag, and people that insist on worsening the lag by typing the word over and over again when they're lagging) is that you need a lot of rep to battle the gym leaders. Brock, the first one, takes 3 rep. Now, I can understand needing to meet certain requirements to match up against what amounts to a boss in this game. Sure...fine. But you only get .02 rep for battling an NPC trainer, and 1/20 of the rep of the opponent in PvP. Both provided you win.

So, it takes a long time to get enough rep to battle Brock. By the time I got to battling him, my Wartortle and Scyther were both level 27 and I had a level 15 Spearow and Beedrill, simply because I didn't want to get the Pokemon I had chosen to use too high. I hate that, when they're too high. Of course, 27 was too high in my opinion, but oh well.

Anyway...I like it.

Maybe when it isn't so glitchy and laggy I'll send it to Cho so she can play with me if she wants to.

Card

2008-07-19T12:40:00.001-07:00

My trainer card! Yes...I was rather bored and found out where to make these. So I made one! Isn't it pretty? I've decided to make a team like this...after I finish off my Eevee team. If I ever get to that point. Those are all pokemon I like of course, and all but Gengar and Aggron have never been used on a team...usually because you get them towards the end of the game and I don't want to wait that long just to get a simple Pokemon.

Other than that, there's really nothing to report. Things are still the same as they've always been. And that's that.

Egypt and Japan

2008-06-25T21:33:00.000-07:00

Last Saturday I bought myself a new pet. A little baby Bearded Dragon named Kemet. He's a cute little one...or maybe she? I dunno. I can't tell. They're not supposed to be very easy to sex, either. -.- But he's very nice..pretty calm, too.

I just went outside to let Buddha Kitty in and there was a raccoon at the food bowl. Must have been one of ours, because it just looked at me, then went back to eating. The other raccoons don't do that.

I lost where I was going with Kemet, so I'll move on to the other thing I wanted to get at! I've decided I want to make a character that gets together with a psychopath. It's an impossible thing, I know, but I'd still like to try it again. No one I have ever played with or that I play with now (Cho) would play a psychopath. At least not a believable one.

But I can dream, ne?

I came up with it for some reason while I was at Kyoto. Kyoto the restaurant, not Kyoto the city. After we finished up there, we went to Borders..and I bought Without Conscience by Robert D. Hare, PhD. It only strengthened my want to play with a psychopath, as I knew it would.

I could probably make one myself, but I don't really want to play that part. I dunno why...normally I would. But now I don't.

Maybe some other time.

Chickens and Molestation

2008-06-19T23:12:00.000-07:00

Huh....haven't been around in a while, have I? Not that I've been busy or anything like that. I just haven't had anything worthwhile to write about. I still don't, but oh well! Here's a post.

This month's CD is the new Linkin Park one. I dunno if I ever mentioned it in here, but I tend to listen to one CD a month when I sleep. If I were sleeping in my room it would be three, but I'm not. I'm sleeping in my favorite place! That's right: the couch.

Now, most people wouldn't want to sleep on the couch. It's supposed to be a punishment and all, but I like sleeping on there. I sleep much better on that couch than anywhere else I've slept. Well, aside from that time I took a nap in the grass with my chickens. That was a really great nap. But I don't think the raccoons would appreciate me sleeping outside.

Yes, they've been coming around. And bringing their babies too! I saw four cute little raccoons exploring the yard and practicing climbing trees last week. It was great! I want a baby raccoon. >.> Well, another one. I've had three so far. Though, of course, I'd rather they be with their mums rather than with me. That's who they belong with.

Rai's been doing good. She's almost ready to move out into the little chickie pen permanently until she's old enough to mix in with the big chickens. Well, she actually is ready, but the weather hasn't been cooperating. That and we now have raccoons coming around every night. As much as I trust them with not harming my chickens, I wouldn't feel good leaving Rai out there all by herself. And yes, I do know that raccoons eat chickens. One ate Sakura and tried to get Yumiko, so clearly they do, but the ones we raised grew up with the chickens and even on the few occassions they came early enough that they could get the chickens...they didn't. Simple as that.

Rai is...still attached to me. She comes running everytime she sees me and puts up a stink when she's in her pen and I'm not..but she can see me. She no longer spends the whole day crying for me, though. Instead she spends the whole day complaining that she's in the pen when the big chickens are out. She's good with them...they get along for the most part. Gene picks on her (I think she's just jealous) but other than that they don't mess with her. They let her follow them around and get treats with them and such. My chickens are used to having more added into the flock, which is probably why they don't bother her.

I'm pretty sure Gene does suffer from jealousy. She like to pick on Kegareru and Rai, both of whom always coming running to me and get attention and "special" treatment. That is, I'll purposely save them treats, I pick them up a lot, and I pet them a lot. Kegareru will spend hours sitting in my lap and letting me help her with her grooming. She's the only chicken that will.

I do have "lap chickens". They like to take naps in my lap. Those are Chain, Cho, Kegareru, Gene, and Rai...and every now and then Leviathan. Chain doesn't like me petting her when she's in my lap. She doesn't like me picking her up to put her in my lap either. If I do that, she immediately hops up onto my shoulder and will sit there instead...which is fine with me. Cho likes to lay in my lap and have a conversation with me while I pet her. This generally goes on until long after my leg falls asleep on me. Kegareru, as I said, will sit in my lap and allow me to help her groom herself until the sun goes down. Rai...will go there and dod the same thing Cho does, except for the time period is a lot shorter. To make up for the shorter, she does it a lot more. She only really gets off to eat a little, then gets right back on. Gene will lay there and let me pet her, sometimes spread herself out to soak up the sun better...and Levy will only ever be in my lap if Gene has already planted herself there.

The other four chickens don't really like to be touched much...which is fine. They're friendly and all with me, but they just don't like being touched. They're more...independent. Unless they lose the group. Then they know to come up to the door and squak until I come out to see what's up. Finding them alone, I naturally assume they lost the flock and lead them around the yard until I find them. Which involves stopping to talk to them once I do find them and possibly giving them a treat if they all follow me back to the door.

Lily spent her first day outside on Saturday and has been dying to go back out there again. We put her in Rai's pen for the day...since Rai was out with the others and there's no way out of that pen aside from the door, which has three separate locks. Nothing that can't get through the gaps in chicken wire is getting in or out of that. Not without us hearing the attempt long before it actually gets in or out. Maybe mum will let the little lizard outside later tonight. It doesn't seem like we'll be getting more rain soon and it's been warm from what I've been able to tell.

As for my characters...Isaac wants me to finish up his story, Damian's been perfecting his art of faking, and Chain has been wanting out of the pocket. And he did get out...for about half and hour I think? He got to go out with Renor...who ended up wondering why she'd even bothered with going out. It always ends the same way anyway.

Cho now has a Venonat named Gabriel! Which Gabriel is happy about...because it means attention for him! Or so he thought. But he's found that no....no it doesn't. It means attention for him from me, though, so I suppose that's better than nothing. And other random people that apparently enjoy molesting model boys.

Second Chances

2008-05-25T11:11:00.000-07:00

My brother stopped breathing yesterday. Just stopped. For no apparent (at the time) reason. Of course, my mum called 911 and such.

Why is it, that when one calls 911, everyone has to come? There was the ambulance (of course), a fire truck, some unmarked cars with the flashy red lights, and not one...but two sheriffs. Why? I thought that was more than a bit excessive, especially the fire truck. I mean, it's not like he's some high profile guy. Just a 21 year old high school near-dropout. Nothing special.

Anyway, they came by and spent a while resuscitating him, which I watched. I needed to know if I'd need to really comfort my mum or not. I didn't need to....not about him dying, anyway. They brought him back, of course. Using some drug that counteracts overdoses. Something like that. I think it started with an N?

Apparently he ODed on OxyContin. Where he got it, I don't know. Apparently he chewed it or something, but they found a syringe in his pocket. Can you take it that way? I thought it was usually injested or snorted. I don't know...but that's what the guy said.

Just to put this out there...OxyContin is actually a pain reliever available only under prescription, and it's safe to take as long as it isn't crushed up somehow and remains in pill form. And as long as you don't take too many at one time, as with any drug. So it's really not illegal or something. Though for him it was, seeing as he has no prescription and no need to have a prescription for it.

Anyway! If anyone has read one of my previous entries, he's in a state detention facility that releases him for going to work each day and he comes here to work on Saturdays so he can have another day out of there and be with his kid for longer than a car ride. He landed there through drug related offenses, so this really doesn't come as a surprise for me.

That facility was his second chance. He only had three months left to go in there, then three years of probation, and he blew it. Majorly. I mean, really. How does one do that? Three months isn't that long of a time. Is it? I hope my sense of time isn't so screwed up that three months really is a long time and I just don't know it. Three months go by in a flash for me.

Maybe he was addicted to it? That would be understandable. It is an opiate, I believe. Aren't those highly addictive?

But I don't really think he was. Maybe he was trying to kill himself. His life was basically screwed. His girlfriend was leaving him and going to take the kid with, he didn't really have much of a chance to blow off steam in that place, and he owes a lot of money for his illegal activities. That's a lot of stress, isn't it? It could be that.

If that was it, he's screwed his life even more now. No way is he getting off so easy this time.

He better not kill himself...I'm tired of seeing him make my mum cry.

Chocolate Vomit

2008-05-22T20:58:00.000-07:00

Sounds yummy, doesn't it? Well, after at least a decade of not throwing up, I finally did it Sunday morning. Woke up at least three times that I remember to do so. Annoying...but chocolaty! That's because I had a brownie. I dunno what I had that was bad enough to make me throw up, though. I can't remember anything that tasted off. The vomit was sort of reddish in color, but that could have been the brownie mixed with whatever else...or the barbecue sauce I had with my shrimp.

It prompted my ZES story. Or maybe it was Jin's revenge against me? I can't remember what came first, the vomit or the story. I guess I'll just have to check.

Work is still dull. Apparently I'm the fastest and most accurate Drowning-In-Perfume has seen, and I could go far. If I had the desire, which I don't. It's dull and boring. Big whoop...putting lines on a screen to make shapes or connect numbers to shapes. So exciting and challenging. She asked if I was bored...and I said no! Because I know that if you say yes, they just give you more to do. As if that'll take away the boredom. It never does. Who has ever thought that works? o.O Who came up with it? In a non-smart ass way, anyway.

I've started reading Gravitation again. I dunno why. I still like it, which is no surprise, really. It's a funny manga and there are very few characters I dislike, none of which are major ones. So, it's good! People should read it. It gets a little out there later on...but that's okay, too.

Loser and Twitch came by just as I got home. We visited the chickens, they met Rai, and then Rai went to bed after eating some of my food. Then we played Killer Bunnies and Loser won.

That's all I can think of for now, so there.

Update

2008-05-13T19:48:00.000-07:00

Haven't posted anything in a while. Lets see...updates.

Work is still boring. The folders still smell like cat piss. Not much to say there.

Haven't been working much on stories, though I've been thinking of continuing Rai's. I have it typed up on my laptop...up to chapter whatever I was on when I turned it in for my writing class while I was still in school. It was about halfway done then. I'm thinking of finishing it up, then revising. And again, and again until I get it good enough. Everything I write is crap in my eyes.

I've got two new games. Three? Have I ever written about getting Super Smash Bros Brawl? If I haven't, I got that when I came home from my trip. Recently I bought NiGHTS and Okami. I like them both, though NiGHTS not so much. The controls throw me off, which makes it so I can't get through the third level of the boy's dream. Pathetic, eh?

Does Mabinogi count as a new game too? If so, I have it. Though I didn't have to buy it, seeing as its a free MMORPG. I like it...it's nice. Aside from selling things on it I don't play it much, though. It's not nearly as fun by yourself.

I've also sort of been playing the Sims. Cho gave me her Seasons disks, so I uploaded them. I have two PlantSims now, another one on the way. That's one of the things I like most about the game...the PlantSims. They look cool and never have to sleep and such. Just take showers or drink things for water, get sunlight, and plenty of love. And you need to take care of their wants, or the bar drops into the red and then bleh...they do next to nothing.

But I like them.

I've gotten into Get Backers lately, seeing as the book stores near me didn't have Yu Yu Hakusho volume 6, which is what I wanted. I fell in to reading Get Backers fanfics, and now I want to start in on collecting that series. The ones I have going now are being slow...and I'm pretty sure GB is completed, so I can just collect them as I see the volumes. Sounds easy enough. Better than having to wait.

I have a new chick. Not a replacement for Khalid. I never get replacements for my chickens, since nothing can ever really be replaced and I would never wish to tarmish the memory of the lost something in such a way. That's a horrible thing to do. But, the new chick. A little white one. I hope it won't end up being like Mokuba and Bakura. I did like them, of course, and I kept them healthy and happy and with them being as big as they were, they were good protection too. But they were also roosters...and I don't want to lose my Rai. Yes, I named it Rai. Hopefully this particular Rai is a girl.

Having Rai has reconfirmed the reason why you never raise one chick at a time. I've always had two or three at a time...because a funny thing happens when you have only one.

Now, I'm used to playing mum for little chicks. Used to making sure their cage is clean, they have enough food and clean water, they get plenty of opportunity to stretch those cute little wings and all. I'm used to that. I like doing that. I like listening to their little sleepy peeps..and the sleeping ones. I like the excited ones when they get their first worm..or other big insect and discover what to do with it. Like watching the others try to steal to the insect from the one who found it and so on. I like listening to them following after me when I go off to check on the big chickens or get them back in the yard and all.

Having more than one chick means they bond to eachother as much as they do to you. They're fine sitting alone for a bit if they have the others there with them. They'll look for you, call for you, maybe run after you once they see or hear you. But they're fine on their own for that little bit.

With one chick that doesn't happen. That one chick bonds to you and only you. That one chick cries extra loud when you're not there. That one chick pays extra attention to where you are at all times. Stays on you as much as possible. That one chick...discovers what to do with that insect by themself. That one chick sleeps by themself. That one chick snuggles extra close to you for comfort and doesn't let you stray more than a foot away without putting up a fuss.

You're the entire world to that one chick...and it's such a sad thing.

But...there's a possibility that, if Rai's a girl, she'll have at least one friend. Kegareru's been nice to my little chick. Shared my lap with Rai today, let it snuggle up against her. She's been nice. It's good...they both need a friend. As does Cho and Setsuna.

Cho was raised with Kage, Katsuya, and Yumiko..and last of which passed away recently. They're all gone now..and she's alone. Setsuna was raised with Khalid and Ramses. Ramses was killed while they were still chicks..and Khalid just died not too long ago.

I have nine in my flock now, excluding Rai, so one would think they'd have no problem mixing in with the others. But I've found it doesn't work that way. They get attached to the ones they're raised with and that's that. That's just how it is.

Maybe Rai and Kegareru will at least stick around eachother. Maybe.

That's all I can really think of...so I'll end it here.

Eternal

2008-04-24T21:06:00.000-07:00

Khalid died today. That's all.

Luck of the Irish, Red Hots, and Graffiti

2008-03-26T13:43:00.000-07:00

Finally, a post.

Monday was my birthday. Nothing big happened. I even went to work. My present was Super Smash Bros Brawl, which is fun, of course. A little hard on controlling for me, but still fun. A little practice and I'll be good. I started out using Link, but now that I have Marth I'm going to be training with him.

My trip! That's right, I went on a trip down to Illinois for Cho's spring break...and we went camping.

But first I had to get down there, ne? I almost missed the train down there. See, I bought this stupid cell phone a little over a month before I was supposed to go down there and didn't bother with activating it so I could save the minutes on it. The guy we got it from said we could activate it whenever. The truth? We had to activate it within a month of purchase, which I didn't do. So the night before I was set to go, I finally remembered it needed activation! So I tried...and it was a no go.

We called the customer service people or whatever, and they said we needed a new chip, so we had to go to the mall real early in the morning (ten o'clock). We get there and wait around for a bit for the ATT person to get to the kiosk so we could get the chip, and after a bit of talking, find out we really don't need a chip. Yeah. Nice, huh? So we waste more time there with her talking to the people and getting the phone activated for me, then off to the train station it was!

The route we were supposed to take was under construction or something of the sort, so we had to take a detour which got us a little lost. We got to the station just a few minutes before the train left. But I made it!

Trip on the train was uneventful. Plenty of farmland to watch go by and such. I took turns watching that and reading books.

I got down there an hour or so late thanks to the evil tainness, but I got a Red Hot cake...which Chain enjoyed. It was good!

Cho and I went camping in this cabin thingy for most of the time. It was by a lake...which was nice and not so nice at the same time. It was nice because I love lakes. I could spend hours just staring at the water. It was not so nice because it reminded me of Dede's cabin....and how we used to go up there during the summer and I did get to spend hours out on the dock just watching the water or playing with the crayfish. Things like that. Which reminded me about how I'm never going to be there again and I really should have taken that horse shoe.

I don't know why that horse shoe is so important..but it is. Just like the ceramic bird I got from there. Important.

But anyway, we spent our time there. We were supposed to go hiking and stuff, but we didn't really do it much. We spent most of the time playing games. Life, Killer Bunnies, and Uno. Killer Bunnies was fun! And we played a few really quick games of Uno. Really, really quick. It was sort of funny. At night we watched Dead Like Me until we ran out of that, then went out to buy a few more movies.

There was a squirrel there that stole our spoons and stuff. Cho named him Rocko...and he was cute, of course. Squirrels are always cute. A skunk also came by..and there were deer! And herons...and other water birds.

When we got home we went to the movies...where I burned my tongue under Chain's demands for Red Hots...and Red Hots..and more Red Hots. It still doesn't feel completely right, which sort of sucks. Things taste off and all. Mean.

I came back on St. Patrick's Day..and we had a little scare that morning. The alarm clock wasn't set to the right time, so though it was set to wake us up at six, it really would have woken us up at seven, and my train was an 8:30 one or something like that. So we hurried to get out of there as soon as we were up...then found out through a call from my mum that the train was going to be about an hour late anyway, so our sleeping in on accident really wasn't a problem at all. Lucky me.

Going through cities on train let me see graffiti. A lot of graffiti. Much of which was really good...and pretty looking and all. Gabriel really liked that.

Daddy picked me up fromt he train station...and when I got home I found out that Konrad had died. It wasn't really that big of a surprise, but it still definitely put a damper on things for me.

It snowed on the first day of spring here. -.- Big snow storm. But it's pretty much all melted now, thankfully. Nothing like going from seeing grass to piles and piles of white. Didn't make me happy at all, especially knowing my chickens weren't going to be happy about it. And they weren't happy about it. I had to give them one of my precious pears to make it up to them. They also got some of my birthday cake, as usual. They always get a slice of it from me...tradition! It's why I never put chocolate on my cake anymore, not that I was much of a fan of chocolate cake or frosting before anyway. They don't like the taste of chocolate.

No Brains

2008-03-03T20:02:00.000-08:00

Work annoyed me again today. No surprise there, really. Though, it's not technically work that annoys me, but the Babysitter that does. I think I'll call her that, since she seems to enjoy it.

She came in today just as I was going to take my lunch break, asking if I can do part of a rush job for her. I said yeah...since I really had nothing better to do. So she's pulls up a chair to show me what it was she wanted me to do, which was one page out of four. It would make sense to just show the one page, right? She shows me all four and tells me what all the parts are and blah, blah, blah. Not necessary. After that, she flips back to my page and tells me how to do every little thing. She even traces over some shapes that were perfectly clear before she traced them over. Meanwhile, I was sitting there starving and letting my mind wander as she went over nothing I didn't already know.

All she really had to do was give me the page, tell me what size paper to put it on, and leave. Just a simple Draw-On-Screen-What-You-See-On-Paper sort of thing. It took me half the time she spent explaining the blasted thing to do it.

Alien Babies

2008-03-02T15:14:00.000-08:00

So, my Goku Sim is apparently a very abductable Sim. He got abducted once, had a girl which I named Kanan, then a few days later got abducted again. This time he had twins, both boys that I named Gat and Jien. So there's only room for one more Sim in that household, and I'm hoping that Hakkai gets abducted simply so I'll have another obsessively clean Sim. I think he may be getting sick of getting up at 4:30 every morning to clean the entire house and make breakfast for everyone. That's on top of his job.

With three kids, I had to make Gojyo quit his job so he can play Mr. Mom while everyone else (excluding lazy-ass Sanzo) works. Sanzo did have a job in the military career at one point, but it got in the way of his Lifetime Want, which is to max out all seven of his skills, so I had him quit after he reached the top. Gojyo's about halfway to his slutty LW, as are Hakkai and Goku. Hakkai wants to be a mad scientist and Goku wants to be a Celebrity Chef, both of which aren't difficult, thankfully. Gojyo's LW is more difficult...seeing as everyone has a crush on him and Sanzo loves him.

Aside from my Sims, I cleaned the chicken coop today! That's right...it's all nice and clean. And my chickens got to spend to the day outside, since it was in the forties and the wind wasn't blowing or anything like that. They didn't have many places to go, what with the snow all around, but they still went out. Walked along the path we always have shoveled out there, ate the snow, walked a little ways into the snow. They enjoyed their day out.

We didn't have any straw left, though, since earlier in the winter they decided it would be fun to scratch in it and spread it all around the shed and outside. So most of it ended up sopping wet and useless and the rest was just swept into the coop. We did have these wood shavings, though, which is what we used. They aren't so bad..and they can dust themselves in it if they want to, I guess. I'm pretty sure they prefer the straw, though.

I cleaned out my mouse cages today too. I'm sure Mickey and Konrad appreciate that, even if I did take away all the food they had stored in the various places. Most of it was just shells and such, and they mix it all together so I just throw it all out.

Konrad's got a tumor growing near her head. Poor girl...I'd take her to a vet, but I highly doubt there's anything they could for her. It isn't really bothering her too much, thankfully. Speedy had one that cut off her breathing. Konrad's just hinders her movement a bit so far as I can tell. I really wish I could do something about it for her. Oh well.

I wonder what I'll be getting after my mice die. Something small, of course. Maybe a crab or newt or something like that. Not another rodent yet, maybe some other time. Konrad's almost two years old now, which is about as long as mice usually live, though not usually my mice. My animals tend to live longer than they're meant to. Happened with my hamsters, rat, and most of my mice. That's what good loves does. Hopefully Konrad will get to two and a half or three. Mickey is a little over a year I think. I forget when I got him, but he was three months old when I did. I know it was last year and before Kouryuu. Maybe I'll get a frog.

I really don't want my mice to die...but I know it's inevitable, as always. I can only hope they'll live as long as possible with me.

Megalodon

2008-02-22T19:21:00.000-08:00

So, I started up the Sims last night, made myself the Sanzo-ikkou. Gojyo wants twenty simultaneous lovers. >.> No surprise there, right? Sanzo wants to max out seven skills..and floats when meditating now. Hakkai wants to be a mad scientist. o.o; And Goku..I don't think I did too bad of a job on making. I was sort of worried he wouldn't look right...but I think I did good. ^-^ Couldn't find good hair for him, so I went with the long ponytail, since he did have long hair when younger. I figured it wouldn't be too far off the mark for an older Goku. He wants to be a celebrity chef for some reason. I never really pictured him as one, but it's not like I can change that now, ne? Besides, he does like food.

I got to read about the Megalodon today! Giant, giant shark. And the Rokuro-Kubi, which sounded really familiar for some reason. Not the name, but what it does...with the long neck and all.

But anyway, dad is now using my brother's car..for money purposes for my brother. Though it doesn't quite benefit my dad. You have to put premium in it, and the battery died today. So we had buy and install a new one, which costed $150. Yeah...worthless car, if you ask me. We're going to sell it..thank the gods. I don't know how much more of that horrible cigarette smell I can take. I hate that smell. And knowing I'm breathing in those toxic chemicals just drove me insane.

I need to see if there's a way for me to package my Goku so I don't have to remake him..should I ever need to. I really like how he turned out..

Lunar

2008-02-21T18:47:00.000-08:00

Lunar eclipse last night! I watched it. Well, parts of it. I didn't stand out there and watch the whole thing, seeing as it was too cold and the tree branches sort of got in the way. But I did go out and check up on the progress ever hour or so. It was pretty, needless to say. I like things like that.

I sort of want to play the Sims. Sort of. I was thinking of setting up the Sanzo-ikkou in a house and seeing where it goes from there like I did last time. Hopefully Gojyo won't electrocute himself to death again this time. I should probably up his mechanical skills before I have him repair everything instead of setting him up with a bar and all again. >.>; Though, the bar had been Goku's idea last time, I believe.

I wonder if I could find some good hair for Goku. I could never find anything quite like that...Or even the coronet. -.-

Gabriel says he needs to good clothes on that game. I do have him on there...but I haven't played him much, seeing as he has no good clothes and doesn't like playing in what I had for him. But I can't find anything, so he's stuck with what he has. I need to make an Anya sim, but I forgot her last name and have no picture to go on...so I don't think I'd be able to make one anyway.

I think I'll just go with the Sanzo-ikkou. They're easy enough to make...I'll just do an adult Goku with long hair and no coronet. >.>; That should do. Gabriel can wait until whenever.

I've been reading up on my cryptids lately. o.o; That's right...cryptids. I dunno why, I just started it one day and haven't stopped. I'm currently going through the list on wikipedia. Lack of much better to do, I suppose. Some of them make me really sad...like when I read about something that once was but now isn't because humans went and hunted them all to extinction, or took away their habitat..or polluted it. Things like that. I don't like reading about that...

I have learned that there are pygmy hippos, though. Only about 300 left, but there are some still alive. So go and catch one, Cho. >.> Catch it and keep it in your bathtub.

Subjects

2008-02-17T09:54:00.000-08:00

I need to get this down before I forget!

I woke up today to the voices of Ash and Jessie on the TV. >.> At first I thought it was an old episode of Pokemon because they seemed to be fighting against eachother. So I opened my eyes, and what did I see on that TV? Dinosaurs. Battling eachother. With "Ash" and "Jessie" on opposing sides. Well, actually, "Ash"'s dinosaurs were dancing with someone else's and "Jessie" was getting fed up with it and had her dinosaur attack them.

Name of the show? Dinosaur King. So, that's their new gig. From one show where they're fighting against eachother to another.

After that was Yu-Gi-Oh! GX, which prompted me to get up and leave the room. Quickly. Horrid, horrid piece of filth.

MS has a new patch. Again. They should really stop updating so much...it's annoying. But the patch actually worked for me this time! I didn't need to go to the site and manually get it. I hated having to do that all the time, especially since sometimes the page wouldn't load and I had to keep telling it to reload until I got what I wanted.

Another change of subject! I watched 16 episodes of Weiss Kreuz last night. 16 whole episodes of partial sweetness. It sort of irked me with the differences between the anime and the manga..and even one episode of the anime to another episode of the anime. Like...Aya's sister was hit by a car and put into a coma, yeah? You learn that in one of the early episodes. Later on, he gets flashbacks of that again...and this time it's raining when it happens.

In the manga - and this I don't know for sure, as I don't have it, don't know where I could get it, and have only seen scans of it a long time ago - she doesn't get run over by a car. Their parents are getting arrested for embezzlement, which they didn't do, and their house explodes. The parents are killed in the explosion, and Aya and his sister are caught in the blast..with the sister going into a coma from that.

At least they kept the explosion and embezzlement in both stories, though the circumstances were different.

Getting off of Aya's differences, Yoji has some too. He's originally a PI with a girlfriend/fiance/wife (they never make it clear in the anime and I don't remember if they did in the manga, either) named Asuka. In the anime she's killed by Takatori's men while trying to protect him from something or another. No clue what happens in the manga, except that she's killed by them too. Anyway, this is all well and good, but they leave a little something out in the anime that happens in the manga. Yoji constantly mistakes Omi for her at first glance, which leads to him hugging him and such before Omi breaks the "spell" and all by saying something.

Other than that, there's pretty much no character development. You don't even really learn about the four assassins' relationships with eachother. You never learn that Aya's supposed to be cold and emotionless or that Yoji's a playboy that goes out every night. Ken's supposed to be a territorial blockhead that plays soccer with the kids in town, and Omi takes care of all the others and just puts on a cheerful facade. You don't learn any of that.

You do learn that Aya is always focused on getting the latest mission done, hates the Takatoris, and doesn't talk much. Yoji doesn't go for girls under eighteen and is hung up about Asuka. Ken's a nice guy, and poot Omi never seems to get a break.

That's it.

>.>; And that Aya wears this horrible orange sweatshirt all the time. And they seem to get new cars a lot. o.O Weird cars, too.

Felon

2008-02-16T16:09:00.001-08:00

Cho claims I need a new entry, so here we go? A new entry.

Dad's seriously thinking about quitting his job now, which would lead to me quitting as well, seeing as he's my ride there and all. I wouldn't mind quitting...I really don't like it there. But then that would mean that I'd have to find a new job or go to school. Both are horrible choices. I'd really rather not do either...It's not like I'll be here much longer anyway. And then I could even get to my normal sleeping schedule...which is to sleep most of the day away.

That would probably be impossible with my brother and his stupid kid still here. Do they really need to come stomping and crying up the stairs early in the morning everyday? Of course, that won't be happening much now that he's a felon.

That's right, a felon! Sadly for me, he only gets six months in Work Release and a $7,000 something fine. Maybe they'll move out after those six months, though. Highly unlikely, but maybe. Hopefully they won't take Lily with them when they move out. I want her. >.> I'd do a better job at taking care of her, too.

Poor little Lily lizard...they don't let her out. They don't change her water. They don't even feed her. All of that falls on my mum and I. Mostly mum since I don't like to go down there. It smells disgusting. But if it were my place, I'd make it smell good and take care of her and Kouryuu.

I went to a pet store today! I saw this reptile I really, really want. It's called a Black and White Tegu. They're real pretty. A red one would be nice, too. But that's my latest want from the reptile world...a Tegu. Before that I want either a Horned Mountain Dragon or the Bearded Dragon. I'm leaning towards the Mountain Dragon since I could put it in with Kouryuu once I get a big enough cage for the two of them. And as long as Kouryuu doesn't try to be mean to it. I'm sure he won't be, though, as he's not mean.

Except to the worms I've been feeding him lately. We have to hand feed him to keep his weight up and such, so we use a little plastic spoon to open his mouth, then slip a wax worm in. He closes his mouth and just lets the poor worm sit there for a while. I think he'd prefer some crickets, but I can't really keep a good enough grip on them. So he'll just have to make due with worms until he gets back to eating on his own.

Silly lizard.

I got my new pokemon team. >.> That's right. The names sort of suck, but they're all girls and I'm really not that good at coming up with female names. I even gave up halfway though. >.>; Anyway! My Gible is Arydun, Skorupi is Toxose, Carnivine is Cassius, Elekid is Ellipse, Hippopotas is Malici, and Piplup is Salistra. Yeah...not the best. But they'll do!

Cho claims I need a post that says I love her even though "I love Cho. That is all." is always on my page. So, umm...I love you, Choness!

Annoyance

2008-02-10T11:21:00.000-08:00

Yesterday wasn't so great, despite the start. I don't want to go into detail on it, though, so I won't. Maybe some other time.

As it is, I wrote a new story last night. Stayed up until around three doing it, I think. Maybe it was later than that. I dunno...but either way, I wrote it. It was sort of stewing in my head on Friday, which hadn't been the best of days. Very annoying day. So annoying, I didn't want to relive it while writing a post about it. So, I didn't! But yes, new story up. First person perspective, too. It's another one on Damian that Cho probably won't like any.

I seem to write Damian a lot. I guess he's just really easy for me to do. Not to mention he's the most vocal about it and the most annoying when he's sulking because I told him no.

I had a story going on Isaac before then, but then things started up and I lost it. It wasn't going too badly. Maybe I'll pick it up again later.

I wanted to play Rune Factory last night, but I couldn't. Well, I technically could, but I didn't want to put all that wood back into the woodshed and have to take it out all over again once I got back to trading it all to Choness. Getting all of that out takes about half the day in the game, since I fill up my entire inventory. At least, all the free spaces I have for it, which is 30 spaces, I think.

I played Pokemon instead. I'm training a Meowth, Sentret, Poochyena, and Ekans to get their evolved forms. A Teddiursa, too. I'd be working on my team instead, but I don't have the Pokemon I need for that yet, and I don't want my starter to get to her final evolution before I have any of the others. So, training other Pokemon it is, just like last time.

I still need to give Twitch her Pokemon.

I took a peek at Maple Story today. They're doing the Valentine quests, now, which gives me a possible chance at getting a blue rose. I doubt I'll play any or much before the event ends, though, so I won't be getting any. Oh well.

I saw part of Dead Poets Society last night! Only about the last half, but I still got to see some. ^-^

I wish I could write Isaac some more..

Raticus

2008-02-09T10:30:00.000-08:00

I had a dream last night that I remember! Yay for me.

It started out with me online reading Cho's fanfiction, except it wasn't all Inu Yasha and such. I read one that was sort of like Death Note but somehow wasn't, and another one that was a Pokemon one. I think it was like this Pokemon fanfiction that I really like. I sent it to Cho once, but I doubt she read it. If she did, she would have said something about a certain key point towards the end of the posted chapters. Oh well.

After that I got off and decided that I wanted a pet rat. I told this to mum and she told my sister to go get me one. So my sister gets a fishing rod and fishes one for me out of a crevasse filled with water. Right when she lands it, she pulls out a gun and shoots the poor thing in the head. There was even blood splatter. But when I get to the scene of the crime, the rat is still alive and doesn't have a bullet hole in his head. Doesn't have blood on his fur either...and he's not even wet.

So I pick up my new rat and start talking to him. I name him Raticus (I know, creative name) eventually and start carrying him around with me. Everywhere. We go to the mall, "we" being myself, Raticus, my mum, and my sister, and my sister keeps trying to kill him. None of it works and we go back home to a futuristic-y house that we're somehow sharing with the queen of the Toad People, Meteus. The name Meteus came from some weapon in Rune Factory.

Meteus keeps trying to kill Raticus too. Popular guy, huh? I get sick of this, of course, and eventually go whining to mum about how everyone is trying to kill my poor rat. So she goes all queen of the house with her robe, sceptor, and throne. The robe is her red bath robe, the sceptor is the TV remote, and the throne is her chair. This apparently trumps queen of the Toad People, because she says no one is allowed to kill Raticus and everybody stops trying to kill him.

The dream stopped there because my brother seems to think that every movie needs to be blaringly loud no matter how early in the morning it is. Even if that movie happens to be a Pooh Bear one with Heffalumps, one of which was named Lumpy. Stupid name. And all Heffalumps have British accents. I hate the movie, by the way, because the Heffalumps look like elephants. And while I know they're supposed to look like elephants, in the original Pooh Bear episodes, they're more like...patchwork elephants. In this movie they really look like elephants.

Raticus, by the way, was a tan and white rat. A young one with nice, soft fur. I was a guy in the dream, as I always seem to be whenever I'm in any of my dreams.

So, that's my dream! Have fun figuring out what that one means, if anyone cares to find out.

Felix

2008-02-05T18:08:00.000-08:00

So then...another post! And to think, Cho had a whole entire weekend to pass me up and she didn't do a single one. >.>; Silly.

Not really much I can think of to post other than I'm tired today. And I was real tired yesterday, too. But that doesn't matter.

The Internet is now fully up and functional...Long live the Internet!

Damian was bugging me all weekend to write him stuff, and I really felt like writing the next part to Broken, but I couldn't. Yes, I suck. I had out a pad of paper and my favorite pencil, but nothing came. I want to write now, too, but I still can't. It's hard to do when I'm doing something else. Other than listening to music, anyway. And since I'm talking to Cho currently and role playing, I won't be able to really concentrate enough to do it. Maybe later tonight. Then I can get on to Gabriel, Isaac, Tye, Chain, and Renor's stories.

Well, Renor doesn't really have a story...more like an idea. But all of mine pretty much just come from ideas. So it will probably sprout into a little story like the others have. Otherwise I'll just save it as a draft and let it sit like I did with Gene's bit...and Chain's. Though, I just need to rewrite Chain's.

Maple Story has another patch to download, which means I'm going to have to reload the entire game on my laptop. I hate having to do that. They should just have it so you can download the last five patches or something, because it takes forever to get the whole game up. Especially if you have a virus scan going, which always seems to be the case on my laptop.

We stopped by Burger King on the way home tonight, since it was snowing real bad and my dad and I were hungry. I got the Veggie Burger...which wasn't bad. Would have been better if I had remembered to ask them to not put on ketchup. I hate ketchup. And they didn't put cheese on the thing! What good is a burger with no cheese? Evil people. Ketchup, but no cheese. At least they didn't put on any pickles. It's always dill pickles. Why? Why can't they have some other pickles instead...or give a choice at the pickles? I like bread and butter pickles...not the evil dills. Why can't they have those instead?

I had Kouryuu out last night and he kept trying to get into dad's office. I don't know why, but he did. Maybe it was because I didn't want him going there? He can be a little cheeky at times. That was probably it. Silly little lizard.

I have Felix with me right now! I don't get him all that often. He's my brother's Gargoyle Gecko...pretty little thing. You can see right through his head..and if it's dark, see little electrical sparky things. Real fun.

Internet

2008-02-04T20:43:00.000-08:00

So...The Internet finally got back up. Sort of. >.> I actually plugged my laptop into the line, but same thing sort of. Just means I get to put this up a day earlier than I would have been able to otherwise.

I spent the whole weekend with nothing to do! Well, not really nothing. I found things to do. Like...I spent four hours making a Yu-Gi-Oh! deck. >.> Yes...four whole hours to pick out 40 cards. Well, technically I didn't spend the entire time doing that. First I had to sort all of my cards. All the Spells and Traps went in alphabetical order. All the monsters were ordered according to type, then whether they have effects or not, then the level...then alphabetical order. Then they were all stacked in alphabetical order. Then I went through them and picked out forty cards. Now all I need to do is make a side deck. Maybe.

I need to make Cho a deck first, though. I dunno what sort of deck I'll make, though. I should probably find out what cards are in her starter deck. >.> If she brings them, I could use them for material for her deck. Yes I could! Or, she could just use that deck..since I toned mine down to make it more fair. I could have gone all out and put in my Wicked Deadroot and other things...but nope! I was good and took into account the cards she had.

The left button on my DS is being all mean and not working, which makes playing Rune Factory a little annoying. I have to press start every time I want to change a tool, item, or spell. So mean! I've been playing, though. Just got through the Kasimir Ruins. Which means...once I wander into Danann, I'll be able to get more platinum. >.>; I already got a little of it. Don't get much out of the Ruins, though. Only about two pieces each time I go in. So, to Danann it is!

I also played Pokemon...even though I can't get any of my team yet. Maybe tomorrow. My starter is already...32 or 33 right now. One of those. I've been breeding and hatching eggs, instead. Once they were all hatched I started training them, though. I'm working on a Teddiursa and Houndour right now.

Houndours are good fire pokemon...the only problem is that in every game where you can get them, it isn't until the very end of the game. Unless you trade them, like I did for this one. Not that I'm going to be using it past getting it up to a Houndoom, but still good anyway.

That's pretty much all I did. All that and watch TV...and get mad at a game since the memory card decided to corrupt it so I can't play my file. Evil!

I do love the Internet, though. ^-^

Pants

2008-01-28T18:01:00.000-08:00

I was actually thinking of something semi intelligent on the way home from work today, but I can't remember what it was anymore. Lame!

So, for now, this post will be about pants. My pants to start out with, then maybe pants in general. I don't know...but I do have something to say about my pants.

That is, I only have one pair of pants that are good now. My favorite pair are worn really thin and I don't wear them anymore, though I make sure they're always in my closet at the very least. I don't want mum throwing them out or anything. I've had them since seventh or eighth grade and they're ripped up the back from the bottoms to the knees. They're a little too small for me now, but I really just need to lose some weight. I could put up with the legs being a bit short.

My second favorite pair are the ones I call the orange ones, simply because of the stitching. All of my pants are black, but the stitching seems to differ from pair to pair. How this happened, I don't know. The problem with this pair is that the button keeps coming off in the wash. The zipper is good enough to hold them up by itself, but it doesn't last all day. Not that it really matters much, I spend most of my time sitting now. Aside from the missing button, it's also got a tear beneath the zipper...a vertical tear. How it got there, I don't know, but it did.

My green pants! They've got a hole in the crotch that I have yet to tell my mum about. Even if I did, they're so thin they'd just get another hole the next time I wore them anyway. So I haven't worn them in a while. That's not just because they're thin, though. My things always seem to fall out of my pockets when I sleep with them, and since I sleep in my clothes, I end up wearing them to bed. Then I have to search the couches once I wake up, which I'm not usually in the mind to do.

My newest pair of pants are still good. The legs aren't too short, the material isn't too thin. No holes or missing buttons. One of the straps is ripped, but it's not an integral part or anything, just decoration. Since I got them from the same place I got my three other pairs of pants, I don't think they'll last that long. No other place has the pants I like though...so what am I going to do?

Anyway, those are my four pairs of pants. What a happy family, huh?

God

2008-01-27T19:15:00.000-08:00

I've been thinking lately (terrible thing, I know). I could say that what I've been thinking about is religion, but I don't think it really qualifies as that. It's more like thinking of the head of any religion - the deity, deities, or concept the people of whichever religion it happens to be worships.

My mind took a meandering course through the various religions I knew of, trying to decide if maybe I could choose one that fit me. Or maybe I could choose a god or goddess out of those polytheistic religions that I could go with.

Naturally, I couldn't.

A religion that's based on a god or goddess that encompasses everything just ticks me off. A religion that has many gods and goddesses ticks me off as well because it seems that a new one is created according to demands.

I don't like the idea that my life is run by something I can't see but, apparently, is everywhere somehow. How, I don't know. Nothing can be everywhere at once, as far as I'm concerned.

Nothing but myself controls me, either. I make my decisions on what to or not to do and follow through with those decisions. There may be some outside force acting upon my decision making process such as another person, weather conditions or something of the sort. Not some god guiding my thoughts or controlling my eventual decision. Not three hags weaving and snipping the Threads of Fate. Nothing but myself and other, purely physical things.

I was not created because "God wanted me to be born, and so created me". I was born because my parents wanted another kid and had sex without a condom or birth control pills to interfere and prevent the process. Two gametes combined, and I'm the end product. Simple. Not some higher being deciding I was to be created. No stork dropping me off on the doorstep late at night so they could find me in the morning (which would have likely killed me, seeing as I was born in early spring when it's still quite cold).

I'm not going to die because "God wants me with Him now", and I'm certainly not going to him once I'm dead. When I'm dead, I'll physically become a part of the one I chose.

Yes, I have chosen one. One I find to be a logical choice. Being a goddess in my opinion, she clearly isn't a he. She doesn't have an animal form or plant form. She isn't everywhere, but she does influence me all the time. Currently, anyway. Maybe sometime in the future, that influence won't be...or will be negligible. That all depends on humans. She did give me life, in a very distant way...and I mean very distant. She doesn't control me, doesn't teach me a damn thing. Doesn't do anything for me at all. Doesn't do anything against me, either. The Earth is simply there, going about her course around Sol.

I am simply on her, going about my course in this pathetic human society that's going down the drain, because of course nothing lasts forever. I've seen that everyday. It's been pounded into my head ever since I'd begun to really notice things. Things end. They die, they go away, they fade into something else. That's the way of the world, galaxy, universe, or whatever one wants to call it. That's simply the Way.

Even Earth will come to an end at some point. Maybe she'll run into Mars or be blasted apart by Apophis. Or thrown off course by Apophis and sent into Sol. Or maybe she'll last until Sol reaches the end of its lifespan and expands...and get cremated. Maybe she'll be destroyed in 2012. No matter which way, she'll eventually cease to be as I know her to be. More than likely long after I'm dead and have already joined her, so I won't even know it. And as much as I hate not knowing something I want to know...that's just an "oh well" sort of thing, huh?

I guess what I've chosen isn't really a religion; it's just life. But that suits me just fine. I really wouldn't have it any other way.

Subtitles

2008-01-26T08:22:00.000-08:00

So...yesterday was a bad day, too. Three in a row. -.- That's rather mean.

Yesterday was a bad day because I felt like I was going to throw up for most of the day. I think it was the tomatoes on my sub..Getting to come home early was a good thing, but then I couldn't stay with Cho all night like I wanted. All I could really do was lay down and try to sleep, which I couldn't do, of course. No real surprise there. I fell asleep at some point and I know I slept too long because my head sort of hurts now. It's going away, but yeah. Still sort of hurts.

Twitch should really find her DS soon..I want to start my game over. I've been playing my Sapphire version..and it's good and all, but I can't seem to remember what my full team was going to be. I have a Camerupt, Sceptile, Vigoroth, and Sharpedo so far. I think I'm going to add in a Duskull and Bagon. That would make a pretty well rounded team. Only problem is I can't get a Bagon until near the very end of the game, which really sucks. I could always trade an egg from my Ruby version though, I guess, but I don't really want to do that.

I've had the second part to Broken going through my head. I should really write it down, but there's different parts to it and I don't know what order to put them all into. Mean.

Mewtwos annoy me. A lot. The one on my FireRed version just didn't want to be caught. I had to start the game over at least five times because it would only stay asleep for two to three turns and kept running out of moves, which led it to use Struggle, which killed it every time before I had the chance to catch it. I spent hours trying to get the thing.

I got up around seven this morning. That's the earliest I've gotten up on a Saturday. Certainly didn't help that Nick had to bring his crying kid up in the front room and blare the TV. I mean...nothing was going on. Why does one need the volume all the way up at 40 when everything else is quiet? I sat up when he left, then turned it down and started getting caught up on my anime. I haven't been able to do that in a few weeks now. People always have the TV, and then I have to go to bed by the time they get done with their shows. Evil. Very, very evil.

I've missed the last two episodes of Blood Plus because of that. A few of Ghost in the Shell, too. I almost missed one of Death Note, too. Which would have been really mean..because then I'd have to watch it on Youtube, and the episodes on there are all subtitled, last I checked, and I hate having to continuously pause it just to read it. I've had enough of dad doing that during Heroes.

Youtbue is being mean. I want to watch some of YuGiOh! The Abridged Series, since I haven't seen it in a while and there haven't been any new videos of it up lately. But nooo...it has to be all choppy and not load the videos when I pause it. -.-

Maple Story has a new patch...I haven't played that in a while. I hope I didn't miss a patch...I don't want to have to download the entire game all over again. That would really suck.

Tired

2008-01-23T17:47:00.000-08:00

So, today was a bad day. So was yesterday.

Yesterday was the worst.

I got no more than four hours of sleep. I know this because I actually checked the clock before I went to bed. Or tried to go to bed. I know I didn't fall asleep right away. Smudge wasn't with me, and I'd gotten so used to falling asleep with her on me that it just felt strange to actually be able to move around. Well, as much as one can move on a too small couch. Anyway, it was 2:30 when I turned the TV off and the stereo on to listen to Zeromancer.

One noise maker to another, I know. But I sort of need that noise. I dunno why, I just sleep better with music going. As long as it isn't skipping. I'll actually wake up if it's skipping to make it stop. I'll also wake up if someone turns my music off, and turn it back on.

But, the bad day known as yesterday! I got four hours, because I couldn't sleep and we apparently were going in early, which I wasn't informed of previous to being woken up at 6:30 in the morning. Silly me, thinking I could go to bed at my usual time. So I got up, ate and changed my shirt, then went on out the door to the below zero temperature of the outside winter wonderland. From there I got into a car that was no warmer, and proceeded to close my eyes and see if I could maybe get some more sleep as I usually do on the ride to work.

Didn't happen.

On top of that, leaving that early meant we hit rush hour traffic. The morning rush hour is worse than the afternoon rush hour, naturally, which put my dad in a worse mood, which put me in a worse mood after the second time he cussed someone out for being stupid. Of course they're going to be stupid. Everyone on the road is a moron and takes stupid chances. Especially in the morning. I kept my eyes shut the whole hour and a half ride, feigning sleep so he wouldn't ask my opinion of the people on the road.

We get to work, I sit in my seat and wait for the computer to boot up and he does the same to his computer behind me. He also put a Steppenwolf CD in, which was a blessing. The silence there drives me crazy. Things go smoothly for maybe an hour before people start coming in, giving dad work even though he says he really needs to get something done today and won't have time to do any of that.

When they weren't around I had to listen to his heavy, angry sighing and bitching about the work.

Meanwhile, I'm sitting at my computer, staring at the screen which was making my eyes hurt more, trying to distinguish one line on a graph from another, then plot some points on it and trace it over. Over and over and over again. I swear they give me all the graphs to do in that place. It's annoying. Twenty whole pages of graphing to do.

So I go through the day like that, thinking that since we went in early, we'd leave early, and I'd get home when there was actual daylight out, and get to say goodnight to my chickens for once. So what do we do instead? Stay until six! The normal time we leave at. So instead of the usual eight hours of mind numbing boredom, I got ten hours of mind numbing boredom with a side order of bitching and frustration.

This was followed by another hour and a half ride home, where I couldn't pretend to sleep and be believed. Even if I did pretend, it's not like he could really see me to realize it anyway. He, of course, went all "rawr" at the people on the road being stupid and I agreed and such even though I wasn't paying them any attention. I was wondering when I'd get to go to bed or at least have some peace.

We get home and I'm hungry, of course, and end up getting stuck eating an egg salad sandwich. What a great dinner, huh? Egg salad. With cheese and lettuce. Mmmm.

Not that I don't like egg salad...I do. I just sort of wanted something hot and there wasn't anything hot for me to eat.

While I'm eating that I get online, which is my normal routine, even though I got on a bit later than usual. That goes fine...Cho even made the day seem a little bit better by trading me some of my Pokemon. About half of them.

Today's evilness.

Dad said yesterday that we probably wouldn't need to go in today. So, stupid me, I stayed up late trying to get caught up on my anime. I should have been sleeping, but I couldn't seem to fall asleep. I didn't want to waste time just laying there, so I turned on the TV and started watching. I fell asleep watching Tactics at about four or so in the morning. I know I started watching it just before then and didn't get through it very far.

Of course, we leave around nine to go to work...and I do at least get a little bit of a nap in the car. At work dad closed the door to our room...his usual "Do Not Disturb" tactic that generally works. Naturally, it didn't today. People coming in and out...giving dad even more work and blah, blah, blah. This dashed my hopes of a possible half day.

It was pretty much a repeat of yesterday, except two hours shorter and the added bonus of dad lowering his window while driving. Yes. Open window while driving. In the middle of a Wisconsin winter. To and from work

Fun!

Spell

2008-01-21T18:46:00.000-08:00

So, Cho spent all day today doing homework instead of catching me my Pokemon. >.> What kind of a person does that? I would have spent all day doing that. Homework is boring, after all. Even catching the same thing over and over is more entertaining than that. Yes it is!

I spent much of yesterday getting Twitch's Pokemon ready for her. I had them all (aside from a Lickitung and Sentret) that I could get her..they were just all on other games. One in LeafGreen, more in FireRed...and Sapphire and Ruby. The only version I didn't get anything from was Emerald. I'm not too far in Emerald, anyway.

The raccoons have been coming back. Up to the door and into the fort, too...since their food is in the fort. I think it's only Gabby, though. There's only been one set of tracks and she was the most social. That's not to say she'll go up to people and such. They only ever came to my mum and I..which is just because we raised them. They'd run off if anyone else tried to approach them.

Mum found a laser pointer thing recently and so Dewbie has discovered the joys of a red light darting around the floors...and over people, "into" couch cushions and so on. Not the smartest cat out there. We call her Buddha Kitty now, since she's all fat/ The next step is Sumo Kitty, then Black Hole Kitty. I think if she gets any bigger than that, she'll have to be Super Massive Black Hole Kitty..then maybe Big Bang Kitty. I don't think there's anything after that. But that's our current fun with her. Making fun of the baby is a rule, after all.

I went to Best Buy on Sunday. Left home with one CD and came back with four. I've been listening to the new Rammstein CD. At least, it's new for me. I also got a CD by some band called Moonspell. Now, with a name like Moonspell, I'd expect some good music. It's a slightly creative name. The music? Horrible. The lyrics would be good, if you could even make them out. It's one of those horrible bands that you can't make out. I hate those. I should have gone with Nightwish instead. They may have been better.

Apparently my work is evil, since every other place was supposedly closed today. I dunno if every other place really was, but my work doesn't close down for things like that. My school didn't either. The only thing we've really closed down for so far is Christmas and New Years. Maybe Thanksgiving, too. I forget.

I've been in a writing funk since I got Broken written down. Isaac's poked and prodded me to get something for him down, as has Amadeo, Wolfram, and Treason. Chain's asked me to finish his thing, so I think I'll do his first once I get back into it. Since he was nice and all about it. That'll teach the other's a lesson. I suppose I may get down the second part to Broken next month. One part a month sounds good for now.

I was supposed to trade Twitch's Pokemon to her today...but it's a little hard when she doesn't get on, hm?

Perks

2008-01-15T20:31:00.001-08:00

I went shopping on Sunday. And I mean real shopping, not wandering around looking at things and such. The shopping where you go in, buy what you want, then get out. "Guy" shopping as some people put it.

My mum and I went to book stores, since that was the purpose of going, and a pet store. Two, really, since the first didn't have what I needed. What I needed was a good day light for Kouryuu, since one of the bulbs burned out. The second one didn't really have what I wanted either, but I got something close enough. Both stores had it in the regular bulb form, but I needed the tube form...so yeah. I settled for a different bulb, which has something on the inside of the bulb which makes it duller than the other one. Which is stupid.

But the books! As expected, no Saiyuki Reload 8 or any additions to Wild Adapter and Let Dai, though I'm sure the new Let Dai is out. It's all translated already and they release a new one each month. The stores just didn't have it. I did find the new +Anima, Black Cat, and Spiral, though, which was nice. I also got things other than manga, which include The Perks of Being a Wallflower and a fantasy called Auralia's Colors. I got that because I was looking for a fantasy that had nothing to do with a war, because as much as I love R.A. Salvatore's books, they all seem to have something to do with a war. I needed a breather. So, that one sounded good and had no mention of a war in the summary, though there's probably going to be some "violent" conflict in it.

At least it won't be an all out war. Hopefully.

I finished The Perks of Being a Wallflower already. On the day I got it, actually. It's short, easy to read. The beginning was choppy sentence-wise. Understandable, of course. Though, I'm sure I was better at writing at the beginning of my freshman year. Maybe it's just me? I think the writing got better as the book progressed, but that could have just been me getting used to the style. Anyway, it wasn't a bad book at all. Sort of reminded me of...Go Ask Alice, I think it was called. About a girl that gets caught up in drugs.

I guess it just reminds me of it because of the style. That is, the "diary" style. Not that Perks was actually a diary, just letters. But still the same concept.

I have 76 pokemon I'd like to keep so far. I'm thinking that'll be it. I just have two more to go before I have them all.

I keep catching other pokemon, though. I'm not going to keep them, but when I see a pokemon I don't have, I have the urge to catch it. And do. Or spend hours in that patch of grass looking for the new pokemon if I accidentally knockout the first one. No matter how rare it is. Yeah, habit.

Right now, I'm heading off to get Heatran. And after that is Giratina. Then I have all I want and just need to find someone to trade them to so I can restart. Again. Piplup team, then the Eevee team. And the Eevee team should be it. After that I'll just focus on getting as many as I can, which is all but the event legendaries like Mew, Arceus, and such.

I really hate those events.

I do know how to get Mew in the Red, Blue, and Yellow versions without cheating, but I can't trade it all the way to Diamond. In fact, I don't think I can trade it past those three versions, which sucks.

I wish I could play GBC games in my DS. Mean thing.

Fake

2008-01-13T18:21:00.000-08:00

Sometimes I feel like a big fake.

Sometimes I forget what happy is.

But I smile and I laugh at all the right times. And nobody knows.

That's not to say that nobody cares, but it's hard to care about what you don't know. It's hard to know what you can't see, can't hear, can't sense. It's hard to sense what's hidden away by a master. A master that rarely allows the facade to slip, and then only when alone.

I do get happy sometimes. At least I think I do. There were a few years when I forgot what it was, but I think I'm remembering on rare occasions now. I suppose that's a good thing. I guess.

My parents want me to go to college. I do sort of want to go as well, but I don't think I'm going to. In fact, I know I'm not. Not that I couldn't. I got good enough grades. But we're just barely getting by as it is, and after what my brother and sister did, I couldn't possibly ask my parents to do that for me. We don't have the money, I wouldn't be able to pay off any loans...and I certainly don't want to do that anyway.

So, I just won't go. Simple solution.

I'm going to be living with Cho, anyway. I can write and maybe go some other time, not that I think writing will really make me much money. Cho's nice enough to let me do just that, though. It sort of makes me feel bad at times..doing something like that to her. But she thinks I can make it...so maybe I can? Maybe. I never get my hopes up for things.

I put that in my journal for creative writing once. I said I never expect to get anything anymore. I meant that if I don't hope to get something, I can't be disappointed when I don't.

He said that was the saddest thing he'd heard in years.

Cars

2008-01-10T18:24:00.000-08:00

The car ride home today was long. We got snow...the wet snow. You know, heavy...comes down in big, fat flakes and melts quickly...but still builds up. So, the plows hadn't gotten out and the roads were all slushy, which meant people were driving slow. This gave me time to think.

My dad asked me once if I could remember any Christmas. I couldn't. Not in the "memorable" sort of remembering. I could remember some things I got..and the sorting of the presents before waking mum and dad up, but I couldn't remember a Christmas. It occurred to me that all I could remember very well was pain.

I can't even really remember physical pain much anymore. I think the end of that was Sophomore year.

It was during winter..at school. Right in the morning...I was walking in and the place was covered in slush. Stupid me slipped. Happened to be the day after I had to bring just about every book home for homework, which made the backpack heavy...which meant I slammed right into the floor. Knocked the wind right out of me and stunned me for a second or two. Then I just stood up and started walking to my locker...before I even started breathing again.

My lungs kicked in about halfway to the locker and I realized that my back really hurt. A lot. Part of my mind said I should go to the nurse's office and get her to call mum to come right back and pick me up again. The part that won simply said that physical pain is unimportant.

Getting up and down stairs was trouble for a few weeks after...and my breath still even hitches now and then when I have to go up stairs. I do worse in cold air, too.

And I don't think I've really sat up or stood straight since then. Not that I did it much before. I even have trouble sitting in a chair the proper way. Like now, I'm sitting in the computer chair cross legged, with my right leg propped up against the armrest. At school I would prop that leg between myself and the desk.

Never straight up or "proper". I just can't stay like that. I guess it could be called a habit, because it doesn't really hurt to sit up straight or proper. I don't think it does, anyway. It just doesn't feel right..and I have the urge to cross my legs or rest my right ankle on my knee.

Just how it is.

Apparently I do creepy butterfly stretches, too. According to some kids in my gym class...well, that used to be in my gym class since I don't go to school anymore and so have no gym class. But they're those stretches where you sit on the floor and put the soles of your feet together. Then you lower you legs as much against the floor as you can and lean forward.

I flatten my legs completely against the floor and lean forward until I'm flat against my lap and the floor. No problem. People thought it was freaky.

Sentences

2008-01-08T18:00:00.000-08:00

These people annoy me. Seriously. It's a role playing room, not a chat room.

Not a room to talk about Blood Plus.

Not a room to continuously ask people if they got a picture.

Definitely not a room to continuously makes faces.

Annoying.

And sentences! Don't people know how to make sentences? They require a capital letter in the beginning, and a period, exclamtion point, or question mark at the end. And they need to make sense.

Work sucked today. A lot. Dad was actually thinking about quitting. Good thing we aren't going in tomorrow...it's his birthday, and just like me, he isn't one to go to work on his birthday. So, tomorrow is the day off.

I got another idea for a Tye story...and a Chain.

One of the reason I hate work...aside from the fact that it bores me to death on a daily basis...is Jody. She actually thinks we care about her daily life...and goes on for half an hour about how this or that happened. As if either of us care. And not only that, but she seems to dump perfume on herself every single morning. I can smell it from ten feet away, and it clings to everything she touches. For hours. Certainly a good insentive to get things done quickly at the very least. But I have to fight the urge to gag whenever she comes in.

Horrible.

I can't think of anything more...so this is it.

Enzyte

2008-01-06T20:47:00.000-08:00

Another thing you don't do...leave soap in the wash cloth/scrubby type thing. I swear, I spend about five minutes washing out the scrubby thing every time I get in the shower, because whoever it is that uses it before then doesn't rinse it out, or even put it in it's proper place. We have a blasted hook on the wall specifically for it! Don't put it on the stupid little handle on the inside of the shower door! I don't want to use used soap when I get in there. No soap that's touched someone else's body, other than their hand..or foot if they happened to drop the bar. No...Clean soap. Untouched by anyone but me. Not used soap that's been all over someone else's body!

Today was nice out for once. Not bitterly cold like it's been for weeks. There still wasn't any sun, but that was fine with me. I usually go my whole summer without much of any sun. It was foggy...thick fog. The kind you can clearly see moving. There wasn't any real breeze, and it got to around the lower forties...maybe. I never really checked the thermometer, but when I went out, it definitely wasn't cold.

The chickens got to come out...and even went in the snow. They were really happy to finally be able to get out...and Chain just gobbled up that snow. I swear, that chicken has a few screws loose. Not that my other chickens don't eat snow...they just only really do it when there's something on it like seeds or they're thirsty. But...they got to come out! And they went all over the yard and found some places where the grass had broken through...and the seeds the little birds drop at the feeders. So I have chicken footprints all over the yard.

Kouryuu bit me today. Entirely my fault. I grabbed his tail to keep him from going under the couch, then went to grab his body with my other hand and he got me. Sharp little teeth...and he's got a really strong jaw, too. Broke the skin and drew some blood. I let him go when he bit me, then had to go through the trouble of moving the couch to get him. I spent part of the day making up to him...by letting him hide in my jacket. I don't know why, but he likes to just stick in my jacket when I take him out, even if it's already dark out.

I'm getting really tired of these Enzyte commercials. They used to be mildly entertaining, but now they're downright annoying.

Speaking of Enzyte, Cho is pregnant. I wonder if her imaginary boyfriend took it? He would have had to in order to even try matching up to my magical penis. Nothing can beat my magical penis. >.> Nothing, I say!

Ice Cubes

2008-01-02T22:12:00.000-08:00

Ice cubes, people! People don't know how to take ice cubes out of the freaking trays. You don't do one row at a time. NO! It's left, right, left, right, and so on like that until all ice cubes are gone from the tray. You don't start at the middle of the right row, you don't start at the end of either. No. You start at the beginning and work your way back. How can they not get this? It throws things completely out of whack if you don't do it that way. Seriously!

And another thing. You don't put "&" in a role playing post. NO! Never, never, never! Other than the exclamation point and the asterisk - if you're using that to mark actions - you use none of the symbols above the numbers. None!

You don't put the character's name in the beginning of each of your posts either. It's stupid, pointless, and takes up space that could be used for more words in the post. What, you can't remember your own character's name? You have such a short memory you can't remember the name of another character that you're playing with for more than two seconds? Role playing is closer to writing a story than a play, people, and last I checked, stories don't have the name of the characters in front of every paragraph or everything they say. That would be horribly annoying.

Whoever translates these Harvest Moon games should learn how to translate better. A sickle is not a hoe! In any way! The only thing they have in common is the type of shaft, and that's only in that game. I'm sure real sickles and hoes don't even have the same shafts. Maybe similar, but not the same. A hoe's shaft would need to be more heavy duty than a sickle's.

And the extra words added in! I had to reread a few things in there more than once just to figure out what they meant and which word or words aren't supposed to be in there. Really, how hard is it to go over the last bit of written code to find out what's wrong in it? It's never taken me long to do. I do that to all of my posts, and I'm not getting paid to do it! I wish I was getting paid...that would be so easy to do...but I'm not!

Work

2008-01-02T18:32:00.000-08:00

I hate work even more now. Yaaay! It grows with each day I go there.

Cho needs to update her journal more often. I'm still ahead of her in Update Land, and I really don't have that many updates.

There was a Futurama marathon over Christmas. They actually showed all of the episodes. Futurama is nice and all...but..I was really looking forward to the next episodes of Death Note and Blood Plus. I got Naruto...but Naruto can't possibly measure up to those two. I didn't even get Samurai Champloo! So mean.

I finished Pokemon. I dunno if I mentioned this before...but I did. I just need to see who I can trade all of my pokemon to again so I can start over...after I collect all the items I may need in my new one. Like, say, my nuggets so I can get Pokeballs quickly and get all the pokemon I trade back. Plus I need to catch the five that won't be my starter. Well, I'll need two of each kind other than Elekid, but yeah. I guess I could always get a Ditto instead of two of each.

I'm trying to get Melissa to write me some Gojyo/Jien fanfiction, simply because I haven't seen much of it around. I think I may have written about it before. I've only seen maybe seven, few of which were good.

Evil.

She said she'd write me one, as a birthday present and what not. So that's good. I suppose. I can't really think of anything more to write, so this is it!

>.> CHO NEEDS TO POST!

Cards

2007-12-31T19:03:00.000-08:00

So, because I owe Cho a post, here's a post!

My cousin Jalen stayed over for a few days. Three, to be exact, I think. We sat around in my room and played games. I got online when I could. The game we played was mostly Pokemon Colosseum for the Game Cube. I didn't have a memory card for it, though, so we couldn't save any of the games we started. We also played the Sims 2. Well, he did, anyway. I told him how to get an alien baby, and he actually did it. I was sort of surprised that he actually managed it before he killed off the Sim. I told him to try to keep all the bars green, but they were pretty much all red after just a few minutes. Is it possible to get an alien baby from a girl? I've only ever gotten them from guys. One of which was one of my Damians on his first time using a telescope to stargaze. >.> Poor guy.

He also spent a lot of the time trying to get me to trade my Blue Eyes White Dragon, Red Eyes Black Dragon, or Dark Magician for one of his cards. I kept telling him that no, I wasn't going to trade any of those cards to him, even if I did have two Red Eyes and Magicians. They're different pictures, so I count them as different cards. It didn't take him long before he started pouting about it...whining and complaining about how he never got any good cards out of packs and doesn't have a Blue Eyes, even though he does. It's just in really bad condition. It's not my fault he doesn't take care of his cards. But yes, that's how it went with the cards. He even tried to offer me both of his decks just for the Blue Eyes, and while there were a few cards in there that I really wanted, I wasn't going to trade a card I only have one of for it. I'd never do that.

He got really upset when I told him I don't believe in God, or any other god. He couldn't understand why I don't, which is understandable, I guess. I mean..he is only eight. But to cry about it? Mum came in then..and gave him the talk. The religion talk, anyway. About how not everyone believes the same thing, and it would be boring if everyone did. That it's what's inside the person that matters, not what they believe and all that.

And then things were good. Until he started trying to beg my cards off me again.

He likes these videos on Youtube called "Pokemon Dolls," which are of a guy playing with Pokemon action figures. Just Ash, Misty, Jessie, and James. Mostly. I think there was one with a few Pokemon like Pikachu and Squirtle and whatnot. Completely stupid videos. I don't see how he finds them funny. I don't think I'd find them funny even if I were his age.

He's a little pervert, too. It's always sex, sex, sex. When he was playing the Sims? "Make her get pregnant! Make her get pregnant!" Of course, I never showed him the "Woohoo" option. No way.

Those Pokemon Doll episodes? His favorite one was where Ash gets a girl cow, and then a boy cow comes along. What happens at the end? Yeah. The cows have sex.

In his Pokemon game, he left two Pokemon at the daycare center, then claimed he saw them doing it when he got the egg. Riiight.

He also made some other claims that were completely, obviously, not true. Like that he caught Arceus and Shaymin without using a cheat. That's not possible without a cheat at the moment. I know that for a fact. And then there was the level 50 wild Blastoise he supposedly found, which is impossible.

Though, I do know how you can find a wild Nidoking in the original Red and Blue versions. It's not a cheat..just a really strange glitch, especially since it happens so early in the journey. I tried to catch it, but I don't think you can...at least, not with a simple Pokeball, which is all I had at the time. What you need to do is find a pokemon just as the last trainer in Viridian Forest spots you. That pokemon will be a Nidoking. >.> At least, it was for me. Maybe it's random?

And apparently, according to him, female Pokemon aren't as good as male Pokemon. Which isn't true. There's no difference between each gender, except that some evolve into different things depending on the gender. Other than that and their role in breeding, there's no difference at all.

He also wouldn't leave Khalid alone. I put her in the box because it's way past her bedtime, and what does he do? Walks over to see if she's sleeping not a minute after, and since she would of course open her eyes and look up when she heard someone walking to her, claimed she wasn't sleeping and so took her out again. Well of course she wasn't sleeping! They don't fall asleep in less than a minute and are light sleepers.

He kept asking me when she'd lay an egg, too, even though I told him before that she wouldn't. She's hurt...her body's not going to waste the energy to make an egg when it would be better spent mending the damage.

He wouldn't let her walk, either, and insisted on holding her..even though she didn't want to be held, which she made quite apparent by flapping her wings whenever she could, then hobbling over to me when he put her down. Clearly she would have rather been sleeping. Or eating. Things needed for her to get better.

We went to the movies today..before he left. Saw The Waterhorse. It was okay...though a kiddy movie. I would have rather seen Sweeny Todd or National Treasure. Didn't happen, though. Obviously.

And that's all I can think of. So, this is the end of the post as we know it!

Presents

2007-12-25T10:36:00.000-08:00

A Christmas post to tell what I got for Christmas. So, here goes:

Two sets of chopsticks, one metal and one wooden with dragonflies.
A wallet thingy to put my cards in.
A bookmark.
Two books, one on Tarot and The Orc King.
Two games, Retro Atari and Yoshi's Island DS.

Before that, I got a jacket from Cho and a shirt from Amanda. And Miso soup from Cho, too.

Khalid is doing better. She hurt her leg a few days ago, but now she's sort of using it. Hobbling about the floor. Poor little chicken. She's a pretty one, though. All of my chickens are pretty, really.

Feet

2007-12-24T20:22:00.000-08:00

So, this post is to get rid of the post about my toenail, since I got two comments on it that aren't even comments. They're just telling me to post again so Cho won't have to see anymore about my feet. I should take pictures of them and put them up.

Another thing about my feet...or the way I walk, really. I'f I'm inside and barefoot, which is pretty much the entire time, I tend to walk on the balls of my feet. My heels will come real close to touching the floor, but they won't. I'f I'm outside and barefoot, which is also most of the time unless there's snow on the ground, the balls of my feet hit first then my heels. If I have shoes on, no matter where I am, I walk the way people normally do. I don't know when I picked up any of this...but that's what I do.

I also bow to my chickens. And my mice, cats, and lizard. I think I even did it to my fish a few times. I dunno.

I'm watching Knocked Up right now. It's at the part where Pete, I think that's his name? The husband of the main girl's sister...Well, they found out that he was sneaking off to do other things, and telling her that he was doing something with a band, because apparently he's in the music industry. Well they got into a fight about how he needed some time to himself and she apparently had a problem with that. I don't see a problem with that. Problem with the lying about it, but I would never be able to stand zero alone time. I'd get really paranoid if I didn't get any. I'm already paranoid as it is...Even at home, when no one's around, I feel like I'm being watched. Even outside I feel like I'm being watched.

Back in the woods I used to feel so at home. Now? Whenever I went out to search for the raccoons, there were eyes watching me all over the place. Same as in the house, in the yard...everywhere. It's like there's invisible cameras everywhere. Half the time I'm afraid to do anything for fear that someone will see. Someone is watching.

Tye's bugging me to write him. I need to go write him...

Lazy Dragon

2007-12-20T18:23:00.000-08:00

Cho isn't going to like this post.

My big toe nail broke slightly about a month ago. Just a bit, but it was about a quarter of the way down the toe, which is why I didn't just rip it all the way off.

Last night, I don't know what happened, but it broke most of the rest of the way off. Which meant quite a bit of blood. It didn't hurt, or anything, so I didn't notice it until I looked down and saw that part of the nail was red. That nice, deep color of red that blood is. So I took a closer look and saw that it had, indeed, broken almost the rest of the way off. It was still hanging on, still in it's proper place, but could be easily taken off. So, I just ignored it for a few hours and let it keep bleeding. No reason pulling it off when other people were there, would no doubt see, and would make a fuss over it. Well, mum would make a fuss over it.

So I waited for the parental unit to go to sleep, then got a little bowl of warm water, a kleenex, and a knife. The knife I used to cut the nail just a bit more to make it easier to pull off, then once it was off, which, surprisingly, didn't hurt either, the kleenex and water were assigned to cleaning up. Now it hurts a little, but only because I had a sock over it for eight hours. Stupid socks.

Kouryuu just slid off of one of the books Cho's letting me borrow. Didn't even put up a fight...just slid on off. He hasn't eaten in two weeks.

I came home today and the tree was decorated. Except for my ornaments. Which meant all the good branches were taken. Yeah. Thanks a lot. We were supposed to all decorate it together, like we usually do whenever we get a tree for Christmas. Yeah...

Cho is being depressed and thinking about breaking up with me again.

Today hasn't been a good day.

Caramel Crispy Treats

2007-12-16T14:48:00.000-08:00

Cho really should put stuff in her journal more.

I think I may be passing her up in Update Land. >.> Anyway!

I bought myself a train ticket to go down and see Cho next year. Finally got around to it. I need to get something to put all the stuff I need to bring in..since I doubt they'll all fit in Sanzo. He may have a lot of spandex space, but I doubt he could keep all of that there. So I need to go buy some things for that. I think I'll get Cho's birthday present early too, and just take it down there with me. Wouldn't that be nice?

I went to the store today and went looking for foods for me, since my foods had all disappeared, and not all because of me. Funny how that goes, huh? The vegetarian in the family gets special food, but all the other family members, or siblings to be exact, eat the vegetarian's food. And then they all go and say that I don't eat real food. How's that work out? Anyway...I found a box of broccoli and cheese Lean Pockets, and some four cheese Hot Pockets. Which are, by the way, the only ones of those Pockets that have no meat in them. And I found a little cheese pizza that I'm going to put some broccoli on, because apparently, all veggie pizzas must have mushrooms on them.

I hate mushrooms.

I found some other stuff too, of other things like that. That is, things that contain cheese and little else. No wonder I'm all squishy...eating loads of dairy like that. Excluding the fact that I don't exercise. I would if I had one of those bike thingies...or maybe a treadmill. But I have nowhere to put those, anyway, so there's no point in getting them.

Mum made rice crispy treats last night. I haven't had them, since they have marshmallows in them, and marshmallows have gelatin, which is made from animals. Too bad, too, because I used to really like rice crispy treats. She even put peanut butter in them, with a chocolate topping. x.X So tempting!

But I'm good at not giving into temptation on most occasions.

I wonder if you could make those with really sticky caramel instead of the marshmallows? That would be interesting to try. Cho should try it!

Those would be really fattening, though. >.> Not that I would care.

O.o Does caramel have gelatin in it? I don't think it does...just sugars and things like that. Hm. I'll have to check at some point.

Yesterday! Yesterday I got a jacket from the Cho. And two books...and Miso Soup. She claimed she couldn't read the brand, but it's in English. Top left corner. I forget what it is, but it's not the stuff that I got. So maybe the tofu won't be all grainy like those ones were. Bleh...evil Wal-Mart. I'm wearing the jacket right now. It's almost like a fur coat, what with all the cat hair it's attracted. >.> Once it gets washed enough, I'm sure it won't do that anymore. My other ones don't. Not much, anyway.

My team is almost up to level 70. Rigel is there, and the rest are all 69, so it shouldn't take me long to do that. That's good...I can trade them all off to Twitch then, and start over with a Piplup team. ^-^ Joy. That'll be my last team, I think, since you can't trade eggs I'm pretty sure and I don't want to use a traded Pokemon. They gain experience too fast, so don't get as many EVs. I'm pretty sure, anyway. Otherwise I'd steal Cho's idea and do an Eevee team after. Which would consist of eight now, I think. Lets see...

- Eevee
- Jolteon
- Vaporeon
- Flareon
- Umbreon
- Espeon
- Leafeon (which is a really stupid name)
- Glaceon

Yep. Eight. Maybe I should see if Cho will let me try trading her an egg? I know you can't trade them over the GTS. Well, who knows, right? Maybe, maybe not.

Christmas is almost upon us! I bought mum her sweatpants today. Went to Wal-Mart with her just for that. Of course, she picked them out. We couldn't find any with cuffs at the ankles like she likes, though. That's stupid...She said she could just cuff them herself, though. Buy some elastic if she doesn't already have any. So that'll be fine. Like one of those Do-It-Yourself Christmas presents. <.< The kind that no one wants, unless they like putting things together.

I was thinking about the Sims last night, and I came to realize that the thing I liked doing most on it was designing houses. I could spend hours doing that, and it's the only reason I ever used those money cheats. Always annoying when you run out of funds while building a house.

But that was what I liked most about it.

Make a nice house...try new styles. Put in some trees, bushes, and flowers. It was fun. They always turned out being really expensive, though. But then, as Cho pointed out yesterday, I apparently have expensive tastes. Not my fault all the ones with lots of room were expensive.

Teams

2007-12-09T15:03:00.000-08:00

So...I want to battle someone. But I have no one to battle. Well, Twitch might have a team at my level by now...but I dunno. I have to wait for her to get on so I can ask. They're all at level 62, aside from Emeris who has ten levels to go to be even with them. Ten long levels. They should make the trainers in-game tougher. It's like battling wild pokemon when you battle them...and wild pokemon are weaker than trained ones of the same level, so not a good judge of how strong your team actually is. I would trade someone my old team for the purpose of battling if they'd trade it back right after, but those pokemon are at level 70..except for my Lopunny, who is level 67. Why? Because the best spots to train are always full of rock and fighting types, and a normal type isn't too good against them, and didn't come in handy against the League.

I think I'm just going to get my team up to level 70 for the League. My other team was good at a lower level, so this one should be too. Which means I'll get them to 65 for my seventh badge, then 70 for my last...and just head right to the League to take them on.

I also played my Emerald version for a bit. Found out I was working on raising a Cacnea and that I only have four badges. x.X I thought I had more...but I guess I started over for some reason. I want to get the three Johto starters, Cyndaquil, Totodile, and Chikorita, but to get them from Emerald, I'm going to need to beat the League, and get 200 pokemon, minus Jirachi and Deoxys. Once for each starter. -.- Annoying. I wish they'd remake the Gold, Silver, and Crystal versions for the DS. That would be nice of them. Much better than coming up with more pokemon and making a whole new game.

I still think they should make a game that combines all of the regions. >.> Where you can start in any region you want, and have a shot at getting all of the pokemon without having to cheat or trade. Now that would be nice...but noooo. They'd never do that.

Water Sprites

2007-12-06T18:23:00.000-08:00

So, I get to get Cho a Playstation 3. 60GB, not the 40 or 80, since they're not as good. So! My mission for the end of May is a PS3. Or maybe before Christmas, if I'm lucky. Probably not then...but I can still try. Doesn't hurt to try.

What else...oh! My Pokemon are finally level 60, which means I got my sixth badge. >.> Well, one of them is only level 1. A Sneasel. I think I named him Emeris. Something like that. Don't know where I got the name, but that's it. I already have my next team lined up. I decided to do one for each starter. So, the next one is: Piplup, Hippopotas, Carnivine, Skorupi, Gible, and Elekid. My last team was: Infernape, Mothim, Luxray, Lopunny, Lumineon, and Lucario. Aaand..this time's team isTorterra, Crobat, Rapidash, Heracross, Octillery and the Sneasel I mentioned ealier, which I'll get to a Weavile after I'm done with this post.

Kouryuu's been really active lately. Always trying to get to the highest spot possible in the area, which means my head usually. And once he gets there, he tries jumping to someplace else...usually the floor. And when I stop him enough times, he starts to sulk. Like Lily...leave her in her cage for too long and she'll sulk..and refuse to eat and make you feel bad until you let her out. Os she'll try getting out herself, which is quite possible for the both of them if you leave the top off. Kouryuu actually got out once when I did leave the top off to go get some water to spray his cage with. Sort of, anyway. I came back and he was resting on the top edge of the cage, just looking around the room. He's heading for the table now...I think I'll let him have his fun if he decides to go that far. Just so long as he doesn't get on the floor.

On a side note, the guy on those pink iTunes cards that you can get in the store looks like Sha Gojyo.

Brain Cells

2007-12-05T18:19:00.000-08:00

Still not happy. I dunno. I sort of have a headache, too. Sort of. More like an occasional pain in the right side of my head.

I saw some ferrets today. Cute little baby ones. I wanted to get one, but mum's probably allergic. I could maybe convince Amanda to let me borrow some of hers and test it out, but I'm not even going to try. Stupid idea. If she's deathly allergic to a single rat, there's no way she wouldn't be to a ferret. Oh well...I have my little Kouryuu for now.

Yeah. I'm not happy.

So, if someone says "There's just enough milk for breakfast tomorrow," or something along those lines, do you then take the milk, pour it all into a glass, and drink it? As much as I like milk...I don't do that. I've been avoiding the refrigerator all day just so I wouldn't be tempted to drink it. My mum told that to Chelsey, my brother's girlfriend...and she takes the rest of the milk. Does she have a single brain cell in her head? I don't think so.

She even took her kid out to sit on Santa's lap tonight. He's five months old. Five measly little months. He's not going to remember a damn thing about it, and she goes and takes him there. Why? She wants to show him off to her co-workers. Is he a ring? A fashionable hair style? No. He's a living thing. While I may not like babies at all, I at least have enough respect for any living thing to not show it off to people. My gods...he's not an accessory.

And she's bossy. Really bossy. One of those If-I-Don't-Get-My-Way-I'll-Make-You-Miserable bossy types. She didn't want him getting an X-Box 360 for his birthday. "You can't have an X-Box for your birthday," is what she told him. Is that what you normally do when someone asks for a single thing for their birthday? You tell them they can't have it? No. You go out and get it for them. Unless it's something outrageously expensive like a house or something you just plain can't afford at the time. You don't tell them they can't have it. But she did. He got it anyway. Now she's been extra bitchy.

How can he put up with her? I mean...I don't really like him...but I still feel a little sorry for him and that poor kid.

Ends

2007-12-02T16:12:00.000-08:00

I'm not happy. Nothing new there...it happens everyday. I was actually feeling a little happy today..for a moment or two. I think. Maybe. I never write anything happy in here, do I? Figures.

Yesterday was my brother's birthday. So he went out to a bar and got drunk, then ended up calling us around midnight to go pick him up. Idiot. Worst day out of the year to do that. Doesn't he know how to think? Jeeze...puting mum in trouble like that. What an idiot.

I need to get Kouryuu food...and my mice. I was going to do that this weekend...but then the snow came. Stupid snow. Maybe I'll skip work one day this week and go then. Maybe.

I got lots of Saiyuki yesterday. All of seasons one and two. I only have four more of those disks to go and I've seen it all...and can have a Saiyuki marathon some weekend! Yay. Saiyuki rocks..so does Gojyo. Especially with Sanzo. >.> GojyoxSanzo is great. But you know...I haven't seen any GojyoxJien on ff.net or Mediaminer. Why is that? I did track some down...I've found seven tops. Maybe. They were actually sort of interesting. I should have saved them...or printed them out. Something like that. Maybe I'll get around to finding them again some day. Probably not, but you never know.

I've been at this for hours, and that's all I could think of. So that's it.

Post end.

Sims

2007-11-30T20:19:00.000-08:00

Another post. I have a little dragon sitting on my head. He climbed up there after deciding my shoulder simply wasn't high enough for him. He always wants to be in the highest place possible. Except for in his cage. Then he just wants to stay undo his rocks and hide. Why this is, I'll never know.

I haven't played the Sims in a while. I just realized that. It isn't so surprising, really. I usually fall in and out of cravings for games...nothing new. But the real reason for not having played the Sims is because I had been playing it when Yumiko died. It brings back those images. Even the Wii version does that, so I haven't played that one either. Sort of makes me think the game is a waste of money now, but I'm sure I'll end up playing it again at some point.

Dad and I stopped at Gamestop on the way home today to get my brother an X-Box 360. $400. We were originally going to get a used one, which would only have been $250, but lo and behold, we'd have to buy a hard drive for the stupid thing if he wanted to save his games. Apparently they take the hard drives out of the used ones to clean them of anything on them, then resell them instead of simply putting them back in the system. Yeah. Smart, huh? Anything to make more money. Anyway, the hard drive was $150...which means the used one would be the same amount as a new one. So we got the new one...seeing as it would have a warranty on it at the very least. I hate X-Box.

I want a Playstation 3, though. I'll buy one eventually...then get my Assassin's Creed for it and anything else I come across that I happen to like. As if I don't have enough games already. I bought Bloody Roar: Primal Fury for the Game Cube along with that X-Box...and I've beaten it already. With Xion and Bakuryu first, then the others. Too easy. I didn't save, though. Didn't think there was really a reason to, what with how easy it was. I'd play it through at a harder level, but it's the sort of game that's really only fun playing against someone else. Something I don't have at the moment. Maybe I can get Amanda to play it with me. She likes Bloody Roar and we're pretty evenly matched at it unless I use Xion.

Bakuryu used to be my favorite, and thus was the one I was most skilled at. I'm still skilled with my Mole, but I'm better with Xion. I dunno what Xion is. It sort of reminds me of a Praying Mantis, but that's definitely not it. I don't even know why he reminds me of one of those bugs. Maybe it's because he's evil and preying on his own kind? I don't know. But he does. Anyway, he's cool looking both as a human and in his Zoanthrope form, and though he isn't as fast as Bakuryu, he's fast enough. I felt really bad beating up my Mole with him, so never changed to the beast form while doing it. My show of respect.

The two new characters in the game are an Elephant guy and Cronos, who turns into two types of birds. An eagle and a penguin. I hate fighting the penguin. It's so small and hard to hit. Stupid thing. But it is on the slow side, at the very least. Not as slow as Stun or the Elephant though. I sucked horribly as those. I will almost always choose fast characters in any fighting game, the only exception being Link in Super Smash Bros. He's not fast...but at least he's no slow either. I only play him because I like Link...and he gets to use his bombs, boomerang, and bow. Sweet.

In Super Smash Bros Melee I usually choose Marth once I unlock him. It's sort of funny playing him against Amanda, because she takes Roy when I play him. They're pretty much the same, as they're from Fire Emblem. They're fast and have generally the same moves...though there are differences, of course. Otherwise it would be like having the same character in the game twice, and that would just be demented. But when we fight against eachother as them, we'll usually execute the same moves at the same time. That is, we'll run right at eachother and and slash, or jump and do the same attack. No signals between us, it just happens. We play against eachother too much.

I can't think of anything else, so that's it for my post.

Heat Bulbs

2007-11-29T17:44:00.000-08:00

Nine whole days and no one has told me to post. Amazing. I'm sitting here with Kouryuu, waiting for Cho to come back. Only one worm left..and he doesn't want to eat it. No surprise there, really. We're out in the frontroom...stupid Packers vs. Cowboys game on the TV. So, of course, they're making a whole lot of noise, which both Kouryuu and I don't like at all. So why are we in the front room? Kouryuu has no heat lamp, and my room gets really cold at night. Well, he has a heat lamp, but the bulb burned out last week. Wednesday. So, naturally, we couldn't go anywhere over the weekend.

Yuki died the day before Thanksgiving. One of the reasons I haven't wanted to put anything on here. Aside from the fact that I have nothing to put anyway. Nothing interesting really happens to me. Not that I mind.

I've been wanting to play MS. Or maybe it's just Tye wanting to get to assassin. Rogue is fine, but Assassin would be better, of course. That's what he is after all. I can't play, though. So I started playing Champions of Norrath again. My first character on there is level....16 or so, I think. Khazbin. I would have started playing him again, ecxept that I have no clue what I was doing with him. I usually have a plan when it comes to games like that. But as it is, I started another character. Same type - Dark Elf Shadow Warrior. He's level eight at the moment. Not doing too badly...I'm saving his skill points until level ten so I can put them into Endurance and hold more things. I think the game would be more fun with someone to play it with....But I never have anyone to play with. Which is why most of my games are one player games. I have a few two player, but they aren't really involved two player ones. More like mini games and things like that.

This computer is acting up and I don't know why. It isn't too hot. I know it can't be, what with my fingers actually being cold right now. But it's still lagging. I hate that. And lately, when I try to bring MS up to check for new patches, it stops responding and I have to open it up again. Second time usually works...sometimes I need to do it a third time, though. Stupid MS.

I hate babies crying. The moment I hear it, the thought "Shut that stupid thing up!" goes right through my mind. Always. It gets on my nerves instantly...and getting on my nerves is not an easy thing to do. I'm a patient person. Things have to be digging at me for a long while before I finally snap. I don't really get why that gets on my nerves so fast. Give me any other crying baby animal and I'll quickly try to calm it down and figure out what's wrong. Like with the chicks and raccoons...it didn't take me long at all to figure out what sounds were for what. I'd just instantly know that they were scared, or hungry, or wanted to play. But human babies? No. Not happening. Even their happy sounds disgust me.

I sort of want to play with Amanda's ferrets at the moment. I wish I could have one...I'd take Jaco and Natas from her right away if I could. But mum's highly allergic. She's allergic to my mice, too...but she lets me have those. They're small and as long as I clean the cages and don't have too many at a time, there's no problem. Jaco need's surgery. $300 worth that he might not even live through. Poor little guy...he's such a nice one. I'm pretty sure something's up with Natas, too. They're not supposed to get thin like that. Her other two ferrets are fat little things. Jade and Jasper. They're all fun. All animals are usually fun for me.

I got new fish. Three - two black ones and one white. The females both have red fins. I named mine Tokito and Ganymeade and have no clue what mum named the one I got for her. Dewbie was surprised to see two fish in her water bowl instead of just Merlin. So she spent hours watching them. Something to do now that it's cold out and she doesn't want to stay outside for very long, I guess.

My wrist hurts. And my eyes. No clue about my wrist, but my eyes hurt because of work. Trying to get them to focus on things I could care less about for eight hours really starts to bug them. Sometimes I get so bored they start to go out of focus. The sort of out of focus I used to get on purpose at school when I was pretending to listen to what the teacher was saying to try to amuse myself. Only this time around, it isn't on purpose.

I hate work.

My brain feels dead.

Arrow Child

2007-11-20T18:09:00.000-08:00

I forgot that Cho had her cake class today, and MS is having a server check. So, here I am...typing a post.

To elaborate on yesterday's post, as to why I wasn't feeling good, it's because I was thinking about my Yumiko. My precious Yumiko.

I had no appetite for a month or so after that day. I forced myself to eat, of course...it wouldn't do to starve myself. She died of a yeast infection in her crop. It basically blocked it so nothing could really get through. Except for liquids, which is what we were giving her. This Equate stuff..I bought her strawberry flavored. We pumped her crop every day..gave her the medicines. I slept on the floor with her every night..or I settled her on the bed with me. I was with her every minute I was home. It wasn't enough.

And then the time came...Father's Day. I had myself locked up in my room with her, playing the Sims. She started throwing up, so I pulled her into my lap..and started petting her..telling her it would be alright, like I always did. It didn't take me long to realize it wouldn't be, of course. She just laid there so still after the first time, fighting to regain her energy...so I started singing for her. The song I sing for all my chickens and only my chickens. She started throwing up again and I stopped...to tell her to just give up. It wasn't worth it anymore. And she did..and it was coming out of her eyes. Out through her nose.

I feel so horrible about it...because I didn't tell her to give up to end her suffering. I did it to end mine. So I wouldn't have to watch my proud bird wither away to nothing anymore. So I wouldn't have to look at her and fight back the tears or struggle to sing for her...or wake up every single hour at night to reassure myself that she hadn't died and she was still with me. I just couldn't take it anymore.

And now she's gone. My splash of grey in the flock is gone. Chicken Cho was so lost after that. She kept looking for her...and now she has no one. She's the last of my four oldest and I look at her and feel horrible. I look at my flock on those few and far between days when I'm actually at home during the day, feel up to going outside and they're out, and I have to remind myself..that it's ten now, not eleven. Ten chickens. Four bantams, six normal sized hens. Not a hint of silvery grey. None of that rainbow to lead the charge to me and beg for a treat. None to come up to me when I'm sitting outside...and climb into my lap like she owns it. Nothing anymore.

Just...nothing.

2007-11-19T19:20:00.000-08:00

So, apparently, I'm supposed to do another post. I don't know what to post...but oh well, right?

I'm not feeling too good. And other than that, I can't really think of anything. Which makes his post pointless. But here it is.

Yay for me?

2007-11-17T18:39:00.000-08:00

Wow...this place even has my favorite font. >.>

Well, Cho said I should make a new journal. So here it is. New journal that I might use for about a month and then never touch again. I'm listening to Dirty Vegas...haven't in a while and I suddenly got a craving for it last night. I had this craving to listen to my Nightmare Before Christmas soundtrack last month, but I couldn't find it anywhere. Annoying. Can't find my Daft Punk either, but I think Amanda has that. She likes them and steals my CD a lot. Which reminds me, I have to get her to give me my games back.

So, I have Rai's story up to chapter ten. Think it's going to be a novella. I haven't had the time to work on it since school ended, though. No burst of creativity like I should have had over the summer. I didn't even have a summer vacation...and I haven't been able to pick up my normal sleep schedule. That is, sleep most of the day away and stay up all night. Usually, from one to six in the morning is my best time for writing or drawing. Things always turn out better then.

I drew Treason. Sort of. It's not done yet, and I'll need to do a lot of revisions to get it just the way I want it. But it's a start...doesn't look too bad. I need to work on the tail, though. Do different angles, different poses until I get what I want, but again, never have that burst of creativity anymore. Except of the mini one in which I drew him. And that only lasted until two in the morning. Mini.

I want to make a new cage for Kouryuu...something that will allow for a nice pool for him to swim in. He can't really swim in what I have for him now...and it makes me feel bad. Poor little guy...Maybe I'll design one and ask daddy to make me one for my birthday or next Christmas. I already have plans in my head...hope he'll like it.